Parent Coaching

All families go through difficult times as they raise their children. Denise will work together with a parent or co-parents to develop a plan to deal with general parenting concerns or a tough situation.

Parents will develop a spirit of optimism as they receive support, information, strategies and encouragement to meet the challenges of parenting.

Sessions can be scheduled for an in-person meeting on the phone, or via e-mail. Sliding fee scale is available to accommodate all income levels.

Common Concerns

• Aggressiveness
• Impulsiveness
• School performance
• Developmental concerns
• Emotional intensity
• Sibling fighting
• Non-cooperation/disrespect
• High activity level
• Peer relationships
• Co-parenting style differences

Workshops

Compassionate Discipline: Balancing Structure and Love

Parenting is a balancing act between being too strict or too indulgent. Children may act like they don’t want any limits but they really do appreciate the sense of safety and trust that develops when parents are in charge. We can be firm and clear in loving and respectful ways by using a variety of positive discipline approaches. Learn effective strategies to gain your child’s cooperation and set clear limits, while expressing your love and acceptance.

Co-Parenting Partnerships

When two parents work together and support each other's efforts parenting is less of a struggle and children gain. Children learn so much just from watching how their parents communicate and resolve conflicts, share joys and responsibilities, and take care of each other. We will explore the struggles and benefits of shared parenting and learn how parents working together can provide a strong foundation of structure and love.

Understanding Misbehavior

Do you ever wonder why your kids do the things they do? Is it difficult for you to make sense of their bad behavior when it so clearly gets them in trouble? Do you worry that they will develop behavior patterns that will make it difficult for them to get along with others? Children have reasons for behaving the way they do and if we can uncover the reasons we can help them to act in ways that supports healthy emotional growth and encourages them to be responsible for their own behavior. Learn how to identify what is causing the misbehavior and develop effective strategies to increase positive behavior.

Emotional Intelligence: Raising Kids Who Connect

“Our feelings are our most genuine paths to knowledge.” Researchers have found that children with high emotional intelligence can be more successful in school and other life activities, regardless of their I.Q. or academic success. Learn about the relationship between the heart and the brain and how it influences our daily interactions with others. Help your child learn to handle difficult emotions and connect with others in positive ways.

Talking about Race and Racism with Kids

What do you say to kids when they ask you questions about painful race related events in the news? Children are dealing with racial issues every day in the media and through interactions at home, school and activities. Research has shown that children become more biased, confused and unable to get along with others of different ethnic groups if race is not talked about openly. Together we can build our capacity for talking with children about race, racism and whiteness that is supportive, grounded in the realities of the world, and hopeful.

Workshops

Take Back Your Kids

“We may be the most child-sensitive generation of parents the world has ever known - and the most confused and insecure.” Dr. William Doherty wrote this statement, in his book Take Back Your Kids. He encourages us to distinguish between our role as confident authority figure and our role as model and consultant so that we can be clear with our children and provide the stability so necessary their happiness and success. Denise Konen will share her approach to reclaiming our rights and responsibilities as parents. In our consumer culture kids need parents who know when to set limits, when to protect them, and how to balance the needs of their own adult life. Although we are raising our children in a very different world than our parents, we can be both sensitive and in charge.

Becoming the Parent You Want To Be

We all dream of the kind of family we would like to create or be a part of but our dream is difficult to realize in the challenging ups and downs of daily life. As busy parents we can get stuck in self-defeating behavior patterns and find it difficult to see how we could do it differently. Take a break and get some fresh ideas to reenergize your family life. We can each learn to utilize our strengths to get past the barriers that keep us from being the kind of parent we want to be and help us to meet the challenges with optimism and confidence.

Nurturing Optimistic Kids

Childhood disappointments can be a learning opportunity. Properly handled they can help our children develop necessary skills to meet the world with a positive can-do attitude. According to the research of Dr. Martin Seligman, children who develop an optimistic style for handling problems emerge as resilient adults, able to savor life to the fullest and rebound from setbacks. Optimism can be learned no matter how negative or pessimistic our children may react to life’s frustrations.

Parents Give So Much: When Are We Overindulging?

What happens to children who want it all and don’t have to work at it? Learn the benefits of allowing our children to struggle and tackle life’s challenges on their own. Imagine how your children will be as young adults from what you see today. How will they gain character and maturity? Many children in our culture are growing up with expectations that the good life will always be available for the asking, without the need to develop either personal accountability or the motivation to achieve.

The SEX Talk for Today's World

Children learn about sexuality from everything they see and hear. Are they learning what you want them to? Our sex-crazed/puritanical culture teaches way more and way less than our children need to know to develop a healthy, positive, and responsible view of sexuality. Come and find ways to talk to your child about sexuality and teach your values while respecting your child's development.

Healing Justice Offerings

Parenting for Racial Justice / Talking about Race and Racism with Kids

What do you say to kids when they ask questions about painful race related events in the news? Children are dealing with racial issues every day in the media and through interactions at home, school and activities. Research has shown that children become more biased, confused and unable to get along with others of different ethnic groups if race is not talked about openly. Together we can build our capacity for talking with children about race, racism and whiteness that is supportive, grounded in the realities of the world, and hopeful. By addressing race directly we create less harm and more connection in our community. (This five week series addresses White parents, teachers and caregivers with children of any ethnicity)

Brave Connections: Interrupting Racism

Do you know how to respond when a relative at the dinner table or a neighbor at a block party says something that you think is biased? What can you say or do when you hear bias or see systemic racism in action? At this workshop you will learn how systemic racism has affected you as a White person and strategies for approaching people you are in relationship with like family, neighbors, realtors, friends, coaches, and teachers. You will have an opportunity to learn with others who are facing the challenges of speaking up and knowing what to say. There will be time to practice responding with directness and respect.

The goal for these conversations is real change - not just scolding someone and leaving them with guilt and shame, nor leaving with good feelings and no change. Good people do things that have harmful impact. We will focus on impact, not intent; compassion, not calling out. (This six week series addresses racism in White communities.)